Irmageddon saga continues with friends and family now waiting up until Jenny finally publishes:

Irmageddon- Day 5

September 14, 2017

I am thrilled to report that when I got my hot, sweaty self out of bed this morning I went to my bathroom, pee’d like a racehorse and then………………………………….

Wait for it……

I flushed it!! You have no idea how cool it was! I felt like a Neanderthal witnessing plumbing for the first time! I did NOT have to go to my swimming pool, fill two buckets of water, lug them to the door, set them down, open the door, pick them up, walk through the door, set them down, shut the door, pick them up, walk to the bathroom, set one down, dump one in the back of the toilet spilling some on the floor in the process, pick up the other bucket, dump it in the bowl, set it down and FINALLY flush the toilet!!!

If you are not a Floridian you might not understand the door open/close part of that so let me enlighten you. We have stalking mosquitoes here. They KNOW when you are near that door and they lay waiting for that one instant that you leave the door open too long and they are IN YOUR HOUSE! Now you’re not just HOT you’re sitting there sweating your tushie off AND swatting at that one pesky mosquito that came in and is slowly stalking your head with that tiny yet deafening hum!

Anyway- RUNNING WATER-CHECK????

But it’s still HOT and we have to boil the water before we can drink it.

But I had hope that since I had running water surely I would get power today. I knew that St. George Street got power yesterday and we are the next street in line going south. Could it be, finally, that those Port Huron, MI power trucks I’ve been seeing all week up and down Courtenay and the Trail would grace me with their presence and hook me up?!

OH HELL NO!!!

And it’s beyond friggin’ AFRICA HOT today!!!!!!

We have progressed to stepping on the sun HOT!!!

So to the people at FPL who so graciously hooked up nearly everyone on South Merritt Island-yes, even the neighborhoods south of me-it’s time to put your money where your mouth is! I’m over being nice so get ready………

Gayle: Jenny, if you are one of the lucky ones, like myself, than you have hit the jackpot. Only people with severe issues don’t have power at this point. I was so lucky to have someone let their limbs over grow so much that FPL can not restore power until a tree is removed. Oh happy joy joy

I want my power on and I want it on now. AND since I’ve waited so patiently I am expecting you not only to hook me up but I want my power hooked up by “Eye Candy Linemen”!! I don’t want the guys from MI now, I want the Chippendale Linemen! I want tanned, shaved, peck popping linemen wearing a hard hat, work boots and a tool belt…AND THATS ALL!! I want to see those pecks glistening in the Florida sun so much that I have to get it my Eclipse glasses back out! I want to see some pearly whites smiling at me while the sweat rolls down the crack of their a$$!! I want the whole show!!! And I mean THE WHOLE SHOW!!

Maehing: Lord have mercy on the linemen that hook your power back up! I hope they are Buffalicious, eye candy poppin’, hunk-o-ramas! Love your Irmageddon post!